Friends in High Places -conclusion.

[penfold]

Friends in High Places. Conclusion.

Characters borrowed from Spooks.
Contains spoilers up to Series 8: episode 3

November 23rd, 2009
Harry moved over to the CD player, selected another piece slightly lighter in tone than 'The Dying Swan', and continued. "You should know that Ros has no idea that you were the reason I sent her to the Bendorf meeting, and neither has anyone else. If Ros blames anyone - she blames me. For sending in Jo - a junior officer- instead of the much more experienced Lucas. There was intel on Nina Gevitsky, which Malcolm would have picked up. Nina had been on the radar for a while - and had Ruth been back earlier she would have picked it up too - it was a series of tragic circumstances that screwed up the whole bloody op. Ros knows nothing, except of course that would have had to have been your order that sent in CO19 to storm the bunker. What else could you have done - allowed our colonial cousins to bomb the hell out of middle England? You said yourself you had no choice. Come on Nicholas - you had no option at all, and both Ros and I know that, and when you've recovered from the immediate shock of what happened, you will accept it too.

You will certainly get fallout from the Americans - Mickelson, despite his dubious business practices in Africa, was a very influential force, and Finn's expose of his doings and his murder online will have some repercussions. But your intervention will be welcomed by Beijng and Moscow. Some good will come out of this for you professionally - your actions saved a much worse outcome, and showed the world that we won't tolerate terrorism on our soil."

" But it's not the politics of it Harry - it's the personal guilt. I haven't come to you to get your opinion on my decision to send in CO19. You've changed your tune anyway Harry - what happened to your 'it'll be suicide to storm the bunker?' It's the guilt of sending them in, knowing Ros was in there. That's why I can't sleep at night. "

"I can't absolve you of the guilt you feel - it's ill- founded, but that is something you'll have to work through. Ros is however suffering a tremendous amount of guilt herself - maybe you two could be of help to each other?" Harry suggested, with the suspicion of a tiny glint in his eye.

Nicholas looked up, his eyes meeting Harry's, a small smile briefly apparent, and said "And you Harry - you mentioned Ruth".

"Too painful to talk about Nicholas -if we're discussing guilt it's here in spades. I was responsible for George's death and there's no getting away from that. I had no option but to refuse to reveal the new location of the uranium. But it doesn't make the guilt any easier to bear - poor Ruth - she went into her 'exile' and faked her own death to save me from prison: then I destroyed her new family, and now most of her old colleagues and friends have gone. She's lost George and Nico, Malcolm's no longer with us and now she's lost Jo as well. She's like a displaced person on the grid, doing her job impeccably as ever, but she leaves in the evening, goes God knows where and comes in the next morning as though nothing had happened. It breaks my heart to see her like that."

"God knows where Harry?" Nicholas stopped in mid-stride across the room, an incredulous expression on his face,"You don't know where she is living? You've not been round to see her? Reinstating her passport and her identity was a classified 'eyes only' instruction to my officers, and I'm very impressed that they denied even you the information . Or maybe you just haven't asked," he said.
"I' ll make sure you know where she is living now. And you'll visit her? Take your own advice Harry - mend some bridges of your own."

Harry handed yet another filled glass to Nicholas. "What would I say to her - you're wondering how to mend the rift in your relationship with Ros - I have no idea at all where to begin with Ruth. I've tried a few times but neither Ruth nor I are particularly demonstrative. Everything's buried so deeply and we've both spent too long trying to function without acknowledging that we had any connection at all.
Jo was instrumental in getting Ruth back to the Grid and agreeing to meet and talk it over with me. And now.... My god, how selfish that sounds. "

He turned away from Nicholas again at the realisation, hoping his feelings were pain at the loss of Jo, and not pain at the loss of his intermediary with Ruth.

Nicholas hesitated, trying to find the right words to console Harry. "You've credited Ros, rightly, with the professionalism to accept what happened as unavoidable, and you've lessened the load on my mind, considerably. Yet you won't give the same credit to Ruth. Once she was picked up by Amish and ended up in that interrogation room she would have almost been able to predict the outcome - two implacable men facing each other using any weapon they had at their disposal. You've convinced me that Ros, and sadly Jo, were she here, would not blame me. Why is it so difficult to accept that Ruth wouldn't blame you?"

"It's amazing how straightforward it is to throw light on someone else's worries, and not be able to do the same for ourselves" Harry said, "we are both so adept at sorting out world conspiracies yet unable to solve our own problems."

"We are both competent, to use Walker's word, at the 'professional' Harry - it's the private, personal things that count. I can turn off professionally when I get home, knowing the decisions, however harrowing, have been made with the very best intelligence - thanks to you and your team. But when they involve someone we're very fond of being put in jeopardy because of them -it's a different matter Harry, a very different matter indeed."

"The thing is -all my decisions involve someone I'm fond of being put in jeopardy -it's the nature of the job, Nicholas"

Harry's mobile vibrated and spun round on the table in front of him, a split second before Nicholas's emitted a single ring tone from inside his jacket.

Both men answered curtly "Yes !", each walking to the opposite side of the room.

"Keep me informed - I'm on my way" said Nicholas, closing the mobile, picking up his coat and making for the door.

"I'lll be with you in half an hour, keep me posted, and send the car round." replied Harry to his caller.

"Back to the 'world as we know it' then, Harry ?" said Nicholas, extending his hand to him.

"Absolutely" replied Harry. Shaking Nicholas' hand "Good night, .........Home Secretary".

[Beatriz]

(01-02-2010 09:02 AM)penfold Wrote:  "It's amazing how straightforward it is to throw light on someone else's worries, and not be able to do the same for ourselves" Harry said, "we are both so adept at sorting out world conspiracies yet unable to solve our own problems."

This is so true.
I enjoyed reading a bit of Harry and Nicholas personal relationship. Well done!

[JHyde]

Hey penfold - nice work! I like the idea of contrasting any misgivings Blake might have had over the Berndorf incident with Harry's guilt over Mani and Ruth.

[HellsBells]

A wonderful piece of writing with an interesting choice of characters. Well Done !

[Tea Lady]

I enjoyed this. Bless, they both really needed a friend/someone to talk to. Well done.

[lwhite53]

This went to a place I never would have imagined, and it was really great! Thanks so much for this -- I loved it.

[penfold]

So pleased you all liked it - thank you so much for all the positive reviews.

I felt that these two powerful characters needed someone they could trust and open up to, and that they needed to have someone they respected to share their thoughts with.